i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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