Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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