just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
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