I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
