You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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