Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
