gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
