Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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