I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
