Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
