To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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