Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize