there's paper in my vomit.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Randomize
