There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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