There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
