Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
you didnt know i had herpes?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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