At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize
