So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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