HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
