Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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