Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
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