I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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