I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
