he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Randomize