why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Randomize
