pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
