btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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