And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
time to smoke my breakfast
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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