how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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