Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
