we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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