We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
We have started to decorate penises.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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