After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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