Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
Randomize
