none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
