The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
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