everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
