I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Randomize
