her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
smell my finger.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
