whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
