Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I'm sobbing to NWA
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
