If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
