the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize