I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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