I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
