David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
