We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
