Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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