i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
