Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
my poor anus
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Randomize
