I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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