What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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